Thought of the night...

So tonight is a very special night. For tonight, ive had the biggest revalation ive ever had in my life to date. Because tonight, while i has having a beer and playing guitar in the backyard while watching the storm, i realized that i think im still in love with someone. And the sad part is, She is soo much better off without me in her life. I guess it all started freshman year. We had History together with Mr Richards. I sat in the back corner on one side, and she was on the other corner in the other side of the room. We actually started talking because we got grouped together for a project. After it was done. We started talking, and eventually we went to the Homecoming dance together, my first slow dance.. And the following monday, i gave her, her first kiss. and it was also mine. Even after we broke up, we stood as close as could be. Through everything. she was always there. We used to spend every friday sitting on her couch, eating popcorn and pixie stix and drink apple juice and ski, watching family guy and Sweeney Todd. And whether it was bowling or going to Long Acre, or just sitting on my bed watching Tv, there was always a calming feeling when we'd be together. I dont know why i didnt take her back when i had so many chances. Ive seen her grow up into an amazing woman, And ive been lucky to share with her, some very wonderful memories. There was a time where i was really sick, and i could barely move, i had no energy left. She didnt call, she didnt text, and i didnt tell her i was sick. And one day she just came over and took care of me. She made me sammiches, and soup. she brought me pixie stix, and sat and talked with me for hours. And right before she left, i asked her "how did you know i was sick?" and all she said was "i just know you". she smiled and walked away. I named my first guitar after her. Because no matter how many places i went, no matter how busy i was, and no matter how long ive been gone, i could come home, and Elizabeth would be there. Just like she was. There were so many things i could tell about her, but i wouldnt have nearly enough time to type it all. But at the end of the day- Nicole Elizabeth Cron is the most inspriring person i have ever had the pleasure of knowing. IF only i could be in her life again, then i might be actually be able to tell her myself, rather than type it here where itll sit here til i delete this thing. but enough rambling from me, im gonna have another Beer, chase the dragon a bit, and then its off to bed...